Facebook: The Truth Behind Your Love-Hate Relationship
Everyone strives to be unique, strives to be heard, strives to find purpose. That is a loaded sentence, but it is loaded with truth.
Facebook tries to pull uniqueness, a voice and originality into its pretty basic platform, right? It’s blue and white, standard textbook, you can’t change the layout or color of your profile, you can’t alter the platform – but you can contribute to the world, one post or like at a time.
What does this do psychologically for humans everywhere? Here are 5 reasons why you have a love-hate relationship with Facebook.
Addicted to the Wall
It’s almost as if you have a (sorry if this is weird) relationship with Facebook. There is something drawing you to check in – almost as if you are checking in on a loved one.
Each morning you rise, you tackle the day and what is amongst the first 5-10 things you do? You click the blue F and wait (while it loads just long enough to piss you off) and then you connect. Keep in mind, each person’s Facebook feed is different, each one is unique SO that means YOU are essentially choosing to follow love, hate, negativity, positivity, watch the cat videos, view the wolf art…whatever it may be.
Which means you can completely choose what feeds into your brain – never forget that. Regardless, you check it – and here’s a little more about the science behind it at Buffer Social.
Every time you open Facebook, you end up getting mad (or glad!) that you did.
Let’s run some numbers. You open up Facebook, what – 15 times a day, 30 times a day – how far does that rabbit hole go? Let’s try not to think about how many times and think about each time. How do you FEEL when you close it? Do you feel a bit more happy, sad, mad, glad or maybe just indifferent? Deep, I know, to really get down and think about each time you open it, how it truly affects you.
The truth is that every time you open it there is a different result. The only way you can affect the result is by choosing who and what to follow. What does your feed look like? If you feel mad 9 out of the 10 times you open it, it may be time to change up your feed. Here’s How To Make Your Facebook Feed A Positive Space via @spireandco.
How did I follow all these negative people?
If your feed is full of fun – it will attract fun. If your feed is full of fret – it will attract fret. What do your followers and who you follow say about you? It’s kind of like the people you run with in high school.
Were you part of the ‘troublemaker’ crowd or did you roll with the smart minds? In a lot of ways, Facebook IS high school. There are tests, there is always some drama and there are clicks. In your mind, you are slowly nodding along and saying, yeah-huh but I have all these new people in my life too! Yep, you do! And are these new people fun or fret? Assess your feed, people!
What you read enters your mind, which enters your psyche – be careful. We are constantly over-stimulated, let’s have a little self-discipline. Let’s face it – “Your Belief Becomes your Reality” and Facebook is a big part of your reality.
What life would be like without Facebook?
You wake up, roll over and open your eyes to the day. Instead of immediately picking up your phone, you… greet your family, you pet your dog, you work your body out.
How many minutes of your day have you spent scrolling your feed? What could you have done with all of those minutes? What part of your life would change NOT being affected (good or bad) from the influence of the feed?
Flip side – would you be as connected? Would you see your family grow up from across the world, see friends enjoy life that you haven’t seen in years, see the world all from your computer. Love, Hate. Worth it? What if Facebook had never been invented? via @Time.
Bottom line – it’s nice to get a little attention, even from afar.
In retrospect, Facebook is all about communication. SO! When you can’t interface with the world, because life, you can interface with the feeling of communication from afar.
Let’s bring up that feeling when you post a photo (probably of yourself, let’s be honest) and all of a sudden your phone starts to light up with likes. Your photo burns up with comments – 99.9999% of the time they are positive comments – BINGO BANGO – attention.
What happens when we get attention (no matter who you are, attention matters, cmon)? @ThisJenKim asks… “Does Facebook Make us Attention Hogs?”. We get happy. We can’t help it. We get all giddy in our happy place. If only for a moment.
So let’s just have that – happiness. If it doesn’t make you happy, don’t do it.
Remember, Facebook is a choice – yours! Choose wisely!